12/23/08

I wondered if I was the only one

wondering if a reporter had not dipped into the eggnog before overwriting

Not fud, just worth remembering

I still recall our Brazilian friend hysterically packing up to move back home during this frenzy. Nothing since 9/11, my ass. 

Not fud, just infuriating

And he had the unmitigated gall to tack an MRI onto his "sympathy" tour. Can Jan. 21 come fast enough? 

Awareness

of all internet traditions -- newly minted in particular.

No accounting

for traditions.

HFS

Bad enough the errors were on what looked to be a blog post. In print? I guess all the layoffs were not just on the letters page

12/20/08

Not fud, just illuminating

He ain't stupid, he's their leader. Donkeys never forget. 

Christmas makes people

fucking crazy. This is actually a pretty good story, but what a waste -- all that effort for no good cause. And 11 pounds of butter for 500 dozen cookies? Talk about loaves and fishes. . . 

12/18/08

Go, internets

For some reason this post -- and the comments it elicited -- gives me absurd hope that the stories behind the promotions will finally be told. Eat your almonds, they said, and next thing you know we have a Torturer in Chief. 

I would say leave dog food to dog experts

but it might be better put: Leave food to food experts. 

(Filched from Romenesko)

Unfortunately

debunking will not prevent a million stories on curing hangovers . . .

Compared with muddled butter

short & smart. History as lagniappe.

Not fud, just LOL

Krugman condensed.

And if food is art

the nominee would have to be melamine in the baby formula?

Christmas

is a sad season for the rich.

12/12/08

Not fud, just good

And the steaming pile in the middle of the definition of sociopath is the guy running around polishing his legacy while trashing the country and getting trashed in torture reports. 

Proving there is no such thing

as bad publicity, at least he got his pelt back today

The 60-minute

scandal that will probably last eight years.

Not fud, unless you count

the gutted sections. 

Not fud, just grim

The Big O is going to need one hell of a shovel to clean out the Chimp's stable. 

All fattened up

and ready for tinfoil. 

12/10/08

Not fud, but excellent

Socialist in chief (and it is telling that everyone takes Medicare and it's a fight with Blue Cross).

Drunk dialing

The guy hasn't changed in eight years. And Panchito coulda warned people. . . 

Once upon a time

saying this would have gotten a writer covered in simian feces. Today it's just accepted as fact. 

Next up

Palin on a tortilla

A long way from bargain lobster

One chilling detail after another -- $2.13 an hour in 2008? 

The medium

is almost as good as the message. I also like that moths flew out of his DI/DO, too. 

Not fud, but telling

The one advantage formerly arboreal media apparently has, and the NYT decides to tuck Sports into another section so you can't throw the damn thing out. 

Curds

and bailouts

12/6/08

Not fud, but literally dead-on


In The Know: How Can We Make The Iraq War More Handicap Accessible?

Imagine one day

lighting up a joint at Starbucks. Would it make Tijuana any less bloody? 

Not fud, but almost revolutionary

Imagine adding a reporter with expertise on another beat to a dull political story. You actually get expertise and context

Anti-jackasses

in Mumbai kitchens

Not fud, but thank allah

someone said it, and incredibly well. Everyone's dancing around as if she only got the aftermath wrong. The sumbitch was eating pretzels at the switch. 

Not fud, but LOL

I may need to fill in my Kingsley Amis blanks. 

12/4/08

All we have to fear

is care itself. (Fud connection? WTF? You eat, you need.) 

Until Jamie Oliver crosses over

I think "foodies" should leave the decision-making to the O Team. 

Calling Martin Parr

See more Adam "Ghost Panther" McKay videos at Funny or Die

(Filched from the unlikeliest snark trove)

Not fud, but truly excellent

And you'd never know it from reading the "liberal" MSM. 

Funny how wrong

resonates more than right. I would never have heard of these if they'd been tasteful. 

Is it any easier

if it's food insecurity rather than the H word? (Saw this in the Journal of "lucky duckies," not the NYT.) 

Not fud, but excellent

I was wondering how you can "create" a legacy in the last dirty days of the most incompetent reign ever. I was looking for the wrong hero in the piece. 

Headline

of the day

12/2/08

Recycle the red covers

'cuz they're worthless. Admittedly, I have not been to Hong Kong since it was on the verge of being handed over, but if this is really the one three-star on offer let's all head to Flushing. 

While Alessandra Stanley

sniffs the old Clinton panties. . . 

Once upon a time

this would have been spit out in a phone call, not published. Go, series of tubes. 

Vicarious

travel & drinkin'

A little too close

to potential reality.

Not all news is bad

The true price of cheap chicken. Imagine that corn converted into soda! 

What are they doing

at the Food Shitty

Not fud, but so apt

Isn't there a monkey house waiting in Dallas? 

11/13/08

11/12/08

Definitely

not brain food

Get out your duct tape

The Thanksgiving hysteria on the internets is truly astonishing this year. It's only a turkey dinner, for yams' sake. Yet every online (and formerly arboreal) outlet is treating it like Y2K all over again. I hate writing about it, but I love doing it because it is totally the easiest meal of the year. Heed what you read elsewhere at your own risk.

Not fud, just LOL

Ordering from pictures

on the menu. Not much light in this tunnel.

Not fud, but good

Giving differently abled ducks a bad name.

11/1/08

Not fud, unless you crave

hemlock.

Not fud, just a taste

of how embarrassing the next few years could be. Nailin' Palin, indeed.

The view from the top

But I disagree about meat. People will give up orange juice first because over-subsidized flesh is just too cheap.

Kick her

while she's dumb.

Chocolate news

Not fud, just excellent

Race to the bottom

when McDonald's becomes the role model for presidential elections. . .

(And having been pilloried my whole life for my first and last names, I know it's not nice to make fun of others', but doesn't Eagleburger sound like something the Caribou Killer would eat? No wonder he did a skinback.)

Porn sells

Especially food porn. This could work.

10/25/08

Not fud, but telling

Clothes do make the hypocrite.

Candied

moose poop

Not fud, but catchy

Westward, ho has a new meaning. 

Straight out of Harry Crews

The things they swallowed

(Filched from the treasure trove)

No fruit flies

on her. Seems to be a theme

Not fud, but good

But it was all the poor people's fault for wanting inflated mortgages. 

Not fud, but good

The whole intelligent series is, though.

10/22/08

Tuscan candidates

Brunello: "When young, unstable; when older, unreliable." Sounds like the guy everyone wanted to have a beer with eight years ago. 

Be afraid

These are considered improvements on the deep-fried Twinkie. Alligators die for state fair fare? 

Not fud, but perfect

How much do clothes cost for a paper doll

Not fud but good

Toles. And Keefe.

I always wonder

if I were on the hate train if he were American, but he seems to be fighting the good fight. 

The power of positive eating

May be flawed, but it's a start -- "fizzy diet drinks" score higher than hot dogs. 

10/21/08

One root

of the evil that is McSame: my native and his adopted state

More on Wasilla beer

Sullivan is right about who else is being outed in this election. And I can trace the beginning of the end to the Reagan years, when an editor at the NYT came charging over to the copy desk after seeing a story on feeding the homeless in DC: "We can't run this! It makes Washington sound like Calcutta." 

Goodbye, truth. Hello, Chimp and worse. Karma's a bitch. 

Not fud, just excellent

The vocal minority dissected. 

The Wild Man

of Fairway speaks. 

Not fud, but LOL

The First Prop

Unclogging the kitchen drain

with a tool stuck in it. 

Not fud, just clearing the record

Hypocrisy, your name is Caribou.

All the beer qualifies this as food

10/20/08

Chicken

or shit with broken glass in it? 

Or, put another way. . . 

She has no family

Why stoop so low to put food on it?

Not fud, just scary

Come to think of it, though, maybe it's more Republican election fraud: This would give pregnant women two votes. 

Not fud, but good

Can one defense of Muslims atone for so many deaths? 

(Filched from ThomasMc)

Rather fascinating

How a blind cook cooks. 

(Filched from the Boy Wonder

Not fud, just good

An excellent summation of the craziness Bill (WTF Am I Doing in the NYT?) Kristol exemplifies. 

10/18/08

Okay, now it's serious

Forget baby formula. When the shit's in the willy spread, we've got trouble. 

Not fud, just scary

Judging by the neck, the "hot" preceding "chicks" must refer to menopause. 

Not fud, just evil

These guys must really believe there will be shopping malls in hell. 

Epitaph? Cheesed

But why are they called nachos instead of Carmens

Bottoms

up.

Not fud, but well put

I had the same reaction

Torino, discovered again

But the kicker has to be the most horseshit ever tacked onto a story. How in the world would a writer know what older people were going home to dream about in a city where she can't pronounce the pasta names? (Also like the reference to panini sandwiches. Sorta like frutta fruit. Copy editors need to get out more.) 

Not fud, but pretty good

Or, the circus without the bread. 

Maybe if we called it

squab.

Moon Pie

and an RC Cola.

10/17/08

Who do you have to blow

to get a Times obit these days? Maybe the guy shoulda marketed wine. 

Christ

in a chicken basket.

I want

what the ad guys were having. 

I always wondered

what the Chinese factory workers were thinking. . . 

(Filched from TM)

I thought this

was a parody. A day's worth of calories in one little gulp

(Filched from Wonkette, which had the legit link, too)

Not fud, but revealing

All the countries where we will not be welcome if McSame steals it.

Of course the first response

will probably be to produce more drugs rather than focus on the food

(Filched from the Role Model)

Not fud, just appalling

What does it say about a party that it can't win unless it cheats

10/16/08

If the restaurant blogs were televised

it might sound like this, but more circular. 

I wonder if the guy

who takes a motorcade to the Starbucks in Sedona is aware of this. Only arugula is elitist, though. 

Just back from the grocery store

where the only sale posters anymore advertise beef and other meat, and I found this excellent take.

Now this

is good.

Not fud, unless your sink is clogged

Shades of Long Dong.

Sorta fud

but very good.

World Food Day

in photos.

10/13/08

Now give him

a genius grant

(Gleaned from the blogger who never sleeps)

Not fud, just abuse

of most senses

Follow

the meat. Moose, that is. 

Best redesign

in donkeys' years. Go, Mug. 

Not fud, but the best

reaction to the Nobel for the loneliest truth-teller

Throw enough money at a food

and it will get healthier and healthier and healthier. (Yeah, I know it should be "more healthful," but that doesn't read.) 

Dissing Ferran Adria

I'm not alone in my amazement at the stunt Sunday Sillies allowed. Forget the post. Go straight to the comments. 

Not fud, but LOL

Parody that is uncomfortably close to reality. 

Talk about missing the point

Finally, a story comes close to revealing why all street fairs are alike. But rather than talking about the unnamed "three production companies," it natters on about whether or not people like the damn things. Maybe they should have killed Metro rather than simply burying it. 

The other side

of the alternative to high-fructose corn syrup. 

Not fud, but acidic

When you've lost Hitchens . . . 

Not fud, but excellent

The Editors come through again. Do not, though, click on the video. Do not. 

The first depression

with all-you-can-eat pancakes for $4.99. 

Another day

another nutrition report that omits a crucial detail: Who paid for the study advocating Vitamin D supplements? 

10/10/08

Well, at least it's not all

ignitable farts. Stupid talk prevails. 

I think she's found a cure

And not a chemical, geographical cure, let alone sugar or shopping, drinking or dropping. 

(Filched from Altercation, where Fridays are the best days)

Let's hope

the citizenry can afford pumpkins in a few weeks. They weren't cheap at the farmers' market this a.m. 

Not fud, but reasoned

His novels are great. His thinking may be catching up. 

The end of roadside eating

as we know it? What amazed me in researching a story this week was how expensive these mass-market restaurants are. Fifteen dollars for an effen chicken Caesar? 

For real perspective, though, click through the slide show. Yikes. 

Headlines you're not reading here

"The queues for free bread are getting longer"

And this says it all. 

One more blooming onion

for the road. 

(Filched from the Aristocrats)

10/9/08

Not fud, but scary

How do they cram the genie back in the bottle once they've lost and go back to their multiple homes? Pow's sugar mama can always steal drugs to get her through the night. What the hell are we supposed to do? My friend's casita in Uruguay is going to be as crowded as the A train. . . .

Blame the Simpsons

for lulling us into thinking the eavesdroppers on our payroll were only picking up pizza orders in their snooping. At least in "The Lives of Others" they didn't laugh. 

Not fud, but LOL

And I found it just after a radically brave cookbook author emailed to say she had just eaten testicles in Paris and when I was just wondering whether to write Pow McSame to ask: Finally, have you no sense of dignity? 

Not fud, but the best summation

of how incomes rank in this banana republic these days. 

Is it my imagination

or is the white daughter eating for two? Mom must be so hungry she's turning uglier. 

Not fud, but worthy

Just unfortunate that this did not have to happen. One little man has destroyed so many lives. 

10/8/08

Shades of

"Five Easy Pieces." Could be a whole parody here.

When tamales collide

Who knew New Orleans was a hotbed of what I grew up eating in Arizona? Be interesting to see how the real deal evolves there with immigration. 

(Gleaned through links starting with Marco on a photographer who put his life to amazing use) 

Not fud, but excellent

Lord knows.  

(Both filched from the fearless Dan Froomkin)

Aesop

reincarnated. 

The equivalent

of, if this is late September, we must run Joan Nathan. 

I'm not going to link

to the travesty, but I will say: Johnny Rotten he is not. 

This loser who sold us the Chimp eight years ago this time should be in stocks in the American town square, pelted with rotten tomatoes if not simian feces, not given front-page space to babble. Too bad he can't be shipped back to Texas, too. Some of us are neither forgetting nor forgiving

Not fud, just valuable

And to think we have 103 more days of the fucker

Not fud, just funny

Idea of the week.

A diversion

from the grimness

9/30/08

Not fud, just right

again.

Rotten vegetables

and flying feces. Sounds like a plan.

But no Molto

magazine? 

Either it changed, or I did

because this place was pretty bad last time I went. Still sad to see it go; where else did the bartenders always greet me every few years as if I came in every night? (Note to the misty-eyed, though: In the mid-80s Columbus was anything but "a rough stretch." Can you say Silver Palate? We fled north in '86 because it was too trendy to navigate anymore.) 

(Filched from Eater

Not fud, just scathing

But she is a worthy successor to the whipped dog last foisted upon us. 

9/29/08

I thought this shot

of Newman's Own's founder looked familiar. For some reason it's missing the Bob Sacha credit/Life magazine September 1988. 

Fighting tooth

and fork. We know where he was eating. 

Time

flies. Although I have zero recollection of either Lean Cuisine or Yoplait the year we immigrated. 

I think cholesterol

would be the least of your worries.

Not fud, just scathing

Go, Rude. 

On the bright side

at least the space will not be taken over by another WaMu or Wachovia.

The meat machine

is breaking down.

(Filched from Daily Dish)

Not fud, just worthy

Art for Obama auction.

9/25/08

As someone spending more on doctor bills

than restaurants anymore, I kinda like this idea.

Not fud, but excellent

A little history is a very good thing. He's toast. 

Not fud, just LOL

And it might actually work.

Not fud, just gag-worthy

Personally, I've had about enough of "leaders" who laugh at their subjects. 

Cakes

for Obama

Okay

Now it's serious.

Lucky

shot. Or stupid. 

Not fud, but good

Drill away

Not fud

Just true. Fool us once . . .

9/21/08

Not fud, but sobering

The merde touch spreads. 

But it's not totally hopeless

And Jeebus, where has this woman been hiding her fire while the fur-clad fraud has been hogging the limelight? (Filched from Driftglass.) 

9/20/08

The incredible

shrinking food world view

Whatever nasty disease we have

it's catching

Not fud, just disturbing

We the people may be getting sunk into debt up to the next generation's eyeballs. But Per Se will always be booked.

Long but chilling, with this kicker:

"What I do know is that an injustice so grave and extreme that it defies words is taking place; that the greatest beneficiaries are those who are most culpable; and that the same hopelessly broken and deeply rotted institutions and elite class that gave rise to all of this (and so much more) are the very ones that are -- yet again -- being blindly entrusted to solve this."

Reassurance

that food has more meaning than fat chefs grandstanding. 

Not fud, but compelling

If I hadn't already decided, a $500 savings would persuade me

Not fud, but damning

He does whatever his captors want. 

Update from Anonymous Liberal by way of Steve Benen:

"Then again, if we bring the same approach to health care that we brought to the banking industry, maybe in eight years or so, our health care system will completely collapse and the government will have to step in and take over. Voila! A national health care system. Brilliant." 


Rather good

9/18/08

First they came

to the kosher slaughterhouse. . . .

Not fud, but I'm starting to envision

Ronee Blakley. . .  (In character, of course. And with McSame getting escorted off instead.) 

Heckuva job

The Sequel

Not fud, aside from the bananas in the republic

At least we already know what it's like to live with a Third World health care system.

Good news for slaughterhouses


Obama Promises To Stop America's Shitty Jobs From Going Overseas

Not fud, just karma

being a bitch

More proof

of evolution, at least in food reporting: A lard story not limited to good fat, bad fat. 

9/17/08

Not fud, just scary

Maybe we should be talking about how being without a kitchen table for 5 1/2 years sorta robs you of your integrity. Most dishonest campaign ever. 

9/16/08

Holy

shit. When I first started writing for a newspaper as a sophomore in high school, I could never have imagined this. Great name for a wine shop: The Fifth Estate.

Bagged

on an ego surf, my kind of crankiness.  

The only surprise

is why Martha has not started another magazine. 

(Filched from the best

Dove Bar

revival. (Click through the ad.) 

Beer

glasses.

Who can think about fud

beyond apples on street carts

Not fud, just says it all

"Conservatism is a luxury we can no longer afford."

9/9/08

Dicks down

the worst cookbook title ever. Are the two dudes not aware of the internet traditions

Better late

than never. Just found this and am more convinced than ever that she is not a pit bull in lipstick but a Go-Fuck-Yourself in drag. That said, the bigger threat is the the crazy creep who found her on vpilf.com. 

Gravy

train.

This explains

who makes ads for McBush: Zombies who will sell anything for a salary. (Call them Lysol-loaded douche bags.) 

Hope we all

like the taste of dog food

Not fud, just sad

I'm so old I remember when the refrain was, "When will they ever learn?" The answer's pretty clear. 

End times

Forget the bacon. Deep-fried guacamole

(Filched from the Sideshow)

If only

this was all funny. 

Justice

Thai style. 

9/6/08

Talk about

locavorism.

(Come for the food. Stay for the ephelant. If this is what they're doing in college, no wonder old pharts are getting canned right and left.)

What's astonishing

is that the bar is set so low, and the shitstorm still erupts from meat producers. 

Not fud, just the best

Caribou Killer take yet.

All that eating in Italy

didn't do Panchito much good

"There are a few exceptions to the decline of Chinese food in U.S. urban centers. . . . We read recently about a reputedly excellent new place in the city's Garment District, but on closer inspection, Szechuan Gourmet turned out to be a sloppy, indifferent rendition of the great, hearty food of the earthquake-plaged province . . . The ma po dou fu at Sezchuan Gourmet was muddy in flavor, beef-starved, with barely a shred of green." 

"A curly cable

on the torta della nonna." Nobody meanders more purposefully. 

Ketchup and beer

Not fud, just useful

for the first digital election

White bread

and circuses.

9/4/08

I'm totally anti-kid

but this is nice. 

My candidate

for the Darwin award. 

I'd almost pay cash money

for one of these classes. Guess which.

I think the first comment

says it all.

Ovens

full of buns.

What

can I say?

Not quite

a banana, as someone said she resembled.

Not fud, just LOL

What to expect next

Not fud, just smells

like salmon.


If it weren't so scary, it would be sad.

Not fud, just enlightening

As the Brits see it. Why do the Goddites not believe in one nation under?

9/2/08

He listens.

He really listens. And then some


Not fud, just revealing

The content of his character. (Should be "sank" his campaign, though.)

Not fud, but pretty good

Except I'm sure it will all turn out as usual: IOIYAR. 

Says

it all. 

Little

laugh.

Armchair

activism. I signed. 

Cats

rule. 

One that got away

Good piece on Indians going back to their native diet for health reasons. But I wonder what they used for vegetable oil thousands of years ago. 

Making the Lump in the Bed

look classy. 

8/29/08

The best part?

McLame will never get to see it. 

(Gleaned from one of the many gob-smacked) 

They're all good

but I like the loopiness of this chicken one. 

Shortening

on a stick. 

Not fud, but funny

And why am I convinced he picked someone from Alaska to counter the Hawaii cachet? You know you're old when you remember when America had only 48 states. 

While my friends and I

were eating great orzo salad and sausage and smoked salmon sandwiches and eggs in garlic sauce . . .

You say it's

their birthday. And what a gift.

Creamed

corn. 

Nuking

the fridge.  Because when I think Cult of Saint Danny, cocktails jump to mind. 

8/28/08

Metamucil

counts as fud. Wolcott is in particularly fine form. 

More money for fud

Unless you have too much money, of course. 

Heckuva job,

Chimpy. If the Russians won't eat the chicken . . .

"Before the pineapples arrived

these rivers ran clean." 

Not fud, just revealing

Nothing to fear but . . .

(Gleaned from another new addiction)

Not fud, just damning

Flashbeer

Pretty

good.

Not fud, just

funny

8/27/08

Some TB knows how to use the Internets

Ooey gooey cheeses? Spare me. 

Not fud, but insightful

I got a sense of this from reading the blogs all week, not from watching the teevee on my small screen, but once again, I suspect the "pros" are missing a story. A big story while NYC Friedman whimpers about getting left in Beijing's dust. 

Not fud, but pretty amazing

Isn't this the party supposedly appalled by the breakdown of civilized civilization? 

Old

but still good

"A smorgasbord of tapas"

And Bobby Flay almost redeems himself. 

Not fud, just LOL

The essence of the essence.

Not fud, but amazing

The old guy gets away with stuff that would have sunk any Democrat. And to think he could avoid all of it just by learning to use the series of tubes like other septuagenarians.  

You can't go back

to first grade again. Funny, though, I also once worked with a couple of people who voluntarily ate pink Sno-Balls every day. The kind from the vending machine, not the urban dictionary. 

For once

the finger isn't pointing at us. Alcopops? Very American to sue the supermarket, though. 

The cooking would not be too bad

compared with the drowning and skinning.