Edible equivalent

of the Shatner reading. Almost.

Good take

on a pretty magical island -- I keep a photo on my desk of our last lunch there, which was absolute perfection.

An intelligent antidote

to the silly post-"Julie/Julia" debate.

comment -- just worth considering.

Or he could have just nattered on

about an umlaut. 

Bigger question?

Why aren't we all fat -- and finally it's addressed.

This fud business

is very complicated.

What does he know?

He only lives/eats/works there.

Better late

than to let a great piece go unread, although you would flip right past it in that scrunched-in magazine. You gotta wonder what happened to copy editors, though: Misspelling Bunyan in the fucking lede?

Love to know

the tipping point. . .

(Gleaned from Chowhound)

Not fud, just uplifting

Eye candy most appreciated when you can't afford new clothes.

Not fud, just excellent

And unfortunately not surprising.

Acerbic is

as acerbic was. Long may E David run. 

Fantasy job

Art & pastry. 

Au revoir to all that?

Maybe not: Two favorites sound as if they're holding up better than fine.

Not fud, just good

The buck never stops with the hypocrite. 

MIT

memories: Some stories are best told visually. 

(Filched from Andrew Sullivan.) 

Not really fud

but rather fascinating. Mrs. Chimp at this point was firmly ensconced in her chair with ashtray at hand.

Not quite enough

to atone for canning Froomkin for BS reasons, but still a very smart move. No loose lasagna there.

Another consequence

of the shutdown of the home ATM. Cheap chicken, however, will always be with us. 

I second this

annoyance.

Texas

the new Dubai.

(Filched from MenuPages Chicago -- we only get the Daily News on Sunday to keep up with murders NYT does not consider news.)

If there's a rule

there's a way around it: the new kugel.

Not fud, just damning

Yeah, where was the outrage? Tbogg is right: send those snowbillies back to the meth farm.  

Ode

to a particular island.

"Biologically defiant"

coffee.

Not fud, but LOL

& posted for non-Twitterists. (He's even wittier in person.)

For once

comments trump column: No kids allowed is a great concept.

Understanding,

I think, why people settle for unripened bananas. 

Lard

and more lard -- great public radio station/site.

"Food is the new fur"

Celebrities stepping in now.

Internet addiction is contagious

(Click to enlarge because I am a digital dunce.)

Not fud, just a good reminder

We've been down Crazy Road before. Even then, though, the rabid foam was not as easy to spread.

No chickenshit

Sherlock. This, unfortunately, only hints at how figures lie and liars figure. Meantime, might be best not to complain about the high price of clean chicken at farmers' market. I'd think. (Photo is also absurdly romantic, too, given how chickens really are raised these days.)

Goat.

Govt catching up to trends. It's what's for dinner. Goat, not trends.

Gullible Americans

always thought you had to drink the bottled water in Eutopia. Then again, my consort and I got very sick in a chateau in the Loire after drinking the tap stuff no one else did. 

Doonesbury

is on a roll this week.

Enviable

Memoir & review both. 

It's not the news

it's the notion. You just gotta wonder where the editors were. (Why one guy getting endless tickets? Who mans 24/7 cart? What is the deli's defense against "instead of" prices that once would have been neutrally set up as "compared" ["with," not "to" -- very different meanings to a copy editor].)

Teh stupid

it fucking burns. Trans fats in lard. All you need to know about how cretinism is not restricted to birdcage liners. 

No such thing

as a free chicken. All issues converging lately.

LOL

No takedown like an indirect takedown. Not once was the word effete typed. 

Not fud, just depressing

Almost atoning for running Turd Blossom in the same spot.

Just what supermarkets were missing

"Apple fries" -- like candy cigarettes, but more insidious.

I'll still eat the stuff

but finally with a guilt smidge -- never worried about the ducks. 

No Dijon mustard

at Denny's? 

Not fud, just smart

One post among many: insurance v health care.

Not fud, just insightful

especially if you consider how universal health care might keep restaurant patrons safer than those disgusting latex gloves. 

You don't want 'em in your kitchen

but in a photo show, absolutely.

Help

is on the way. Scariest part of travel is dreading being wedged against fattest slob in departure lounge.

Chuckle

buried within the latest on the First Mastication.

Old but fascinating

on many levels.

(Filched from Cold Mud.)

Yes, a smile

would kill you. I think Bob and I have seen that second scene more times than we can count. 

World saved

from "blush" wines. 

(Filched from the Food Section)

Next:

the baconizer? 

Wyl-E, king of the kitchen

Not fud, just good

Guy w/two daddies has to be weeping. 

Not fud, just uplifting

And to think he could just be clearing brush for the cameras. 

Even the gentlest among us

had to call horseshit on skinny arms and all. 

Being my own

flack.

Good

diversion.

Not fud, just LOL

Wingnuts -- you get the jokes for free.

Not fud, just sharp

Call it what it is, except these terrorists are too chickenshit to suicide-bomb.

You adjudicate

what you eat. WTF is with these blancmanges?

Onions

and genitals: Dear Cook's. . .

No nuts

like wingnuts.

I could have warned her

Rome when it sucks really sucks.

But force-feeding ducks

is cruel and must be stopped. Having grown up with chickens, I never get the allure of live poultry markets. Especially now.

A scalpel

when a shrink would help. Met a plastic surgeon recently who said one business holding steady lately is carving away folds left from bariatric surgery on patients still fucked up from overeating.

Where to even begin

with this now that it's finally broken through into "real" media? How many others were on the same trips and "reporting" for other holier-than-thou outlets? And this whole look-the-other-way approach to freelancers never fails to amaze me.

Not fud, just sharp

Mr. Five Deferments/I Had Other Priorities will never listen, of course.

Hard to argue

until you wonder why diet sodas will be exempt. They ain't exactly health drinks. 

Worth

the virtual voyage.

Iraq

in flavor fragments.

And they wonder

why everyone has lost faith in newspapers? How revealing is this lede?

Play those old-time

menus.

Ethics

schmethics.

Buffalo sees the green light

Drive around downtown and it's hard to see how chickens would be any worse. 

(Thanks to Astrology Mundo) 

Not fud, just funny

A "voracious reader" upchucks for big bucks.

Not fud, just good

Singing on the Titanic.

Even Colbert has his limits

He talks dog food but knows cat food has to be more palatable.

$2 million for pediatric cancer research

a cookie at a time.

I hate tabbouleh

but virtual is not bad.

If they put non-Kraft mustard

in the MREs, would these braying idiots STFU and enlist already? (Hate to push up the traffic, but they don't seem to get that people will always come to gawk at freaks and pinheads.)

In praise

of meat drippings. 

Pretzels

and Dijon mustard. But what's with the butter in the deviled eggs?

Making McGee

look like McGoo.

One

solution to everything. 

Grownups

are back in charge. Even with cheese. Of course, it's an elitist cheese. 

As the terror subsides

reality bites.

Escalating

the idiocy. I had no idea free choice stopped at the burger counter.

Not fud, just weirdly good

Cracker Barrel should remake it.

Not fud, just weirdly good

Mr. Fish will not drink the Kool-Aid.

Spreading

like pig shit.

Not fud, just perspective

From here to here.

Via.

It's National Celebrate Brits Day

First they ban a frothing lunatic, then they come up with this antidote to the BS. 

(Gleaned from the voracious EatMeDaily)

Fresh idea:

Panzone.

Not fud, but pretty entertaining

and well worth clicking through for the audio. 

Real Americans

don't eat Dijon mustard, of course. 

Where do pigs go

to get their reputation back? (Collective reputation, in case that looks like a grammar problem.)

Feeling

bad about her dreck.

True

love.

Nothing better

than a bad review.

Grazie, Zibibbo.

Not fud, just uplifting

Even though it is an ad.

Not fud, unless you count

nut sacks on this glorious anniversary, six years after war was over. 

Cat food

would be different, I'm sure. 

Fear of swine

The word, not the thing.

Not fud, just good

Ping-pong balls flying. 

Not fud, just revealing

And to think eight years ago we were supposed to bow to a boyfriend snuffer. Go, Hillary, too. 

Kudos to the Chicago Tribune

for this, but what a brutal assignment. Food is the ultimate moving target. Even growing all your own, including olive trees, would not solve all the problems created in the thousands of years since the first fire seared off a nice slow-moving game animal. And not every picture tells the story. Can you say free-range pigs? 

Domino's with extra boogers

& perspective. 

Time for the Pork Board

to commission a new study. Factory farms are trouble with a capital T. 

So much for industrial hogs

being safer than "free-range" swine. 

comment. 

Camera,

meet the world beyond the dinner table. 

MR. KRIST: Sharing a little of yourself is always the best way to go. If you're in a market, buy a little sample of what they're selling, try it, comment on it, and by the time that interchange is over they're smiling and ready when you bring your camera up. The last thing you want to do is try to sneak pictures, because you will get caught.

 

More than you ever wanted to know

about hairballs in the digestive tract. 

Typhoid Mary

will not be taking a day off from the kitchen in this country.

Let the guessing games begin

Who was that bitchy woman? 

Great

minds. . .

Where's

the de Cecco? 

One woman's pork

is another's pound of prevention. 

One obit

Biff Grimes should have written. This is pretty effen lame.

The long udder

of the Camorra.

I'll have

what she's digesting. Seriously??

I guess the ad counts

as fud. But Jeebus, you don't know whether to laugh or weep.

Not fud, just entertaining

No sillier than the real deal, either.

And no one said

a thing to me about it.

The life aquatic

with chocolate.

Chicken

fried, and hiding behind tea bags.

(Filched from Crooks&)

I have many qualms

but this has stuck in my cranial sieve, so it clearly has impact.

(Gleaned from All Hat)

Jonathan Swift

would not quite know what to make of it.

No fud, just sharp

Quick guide to fascism.

Not fud, just good

Somewhere, S.I. Hayakawa is smiling.

Tough

question.

(Filched from Bartcop)

Spaghetti

and hot dogs. Kinda like it.

I'm not going to link

because I hate to drive traffic to them, but the Maroons have really outdone themselves this time, bitching that the food in Cuba is too boring, only rice and beans and pork and chicken. Did they ever stop and consider why that might be? Ugly Americans and fat, to boot. (And WTF is with the bitters in the mojitos? And I assume ice was okay even though salad was too risky?) 

Giving new meaning

to "engulf and devour." 

Taking stock

as a professional eater and coming up a loser: Have only eaten at eight of the 50.

Not fud, just great

I'd settle for OK-Mex food. 

And to think

he is 88 years old. 

Not fud, but definitely LOL

It is possible to parody a parody.

L

OL.

I'm embarrassed to admit

I looked.

Not fud, just good

Idjits. Transparent idjits at that.

Not fud, just good

Pandering to the fringe -- where's that gotten newspapers? 

Good

one.

Holy crap

Woman's Day? I just look at those and think of coffee going cold, though. 

(Filched from David Lebovitz via Facebook.) 

Not fud, just funny

And what all kids inheriting this earth will need to get by.

Speaking of copy editors

Count the screw-ups, starting with the villains in the piece ending up with a company. Jeebus White. 

On a high horse

with no copy editor. Fieri, Ferari, let's call the Pollen off. 

Real

cucumbers.

I think Larry Craig

does this.

(Filched from Eschaton)

Now

we're talking. If only the MTA would do the same, with those guys who sit with their legs in two ZIP Codes as well. 

Bad enough they're meeting

on communal (socialist) property. But it's as if the planners of the Iraq invasion were in charge.

Not fud, just great

Fools with megaphones, the most dangerous kind. 

Good point

but exempting diet sodas is absurd. Tax 'em all. 

Coverage

of their wines and other indulgences is almost as annoying. 

Vicarious

kirs.

The trash

that keeps on trashing. Water bottles are like diamonds. 

Not fud, just damning

Political journalists: Puppets with delusions of independence. 

"Festival

of the testicles."

Not fud, just the crux

of the ugly matter.

They really should

have discovered loose tea.

Issues

ya think? What a hollow little man. 

Not fud, just eloquent

Republican obit. 

(Filched from Tomasky.)

Pimping

pesticides.

Not fud, just math

Throw another tea bag onto the bonfire of stupidity. 

Perspective

How the world eats. Or doesn't.

The sound

of heads exploding. Where were these guys when Go Fuck Yourself was flying around like a turducken?

Not fud, just good

and grim.

Springtime

for Alice.

Not fud, just perspective

If America has one religion, it's greed.

Keeping the world safe

for peanut processors. Love the churches ratting each other out, though.

What fools

these wingnuts be. Jeebus.

The makeover

is incomplete. 

Not fud, but pretty good

It's almost as if they made the damn thing to have it "fixed."

Old

but good.

There's gold

in dirty water.

Okay. Farmed mussels

from freshdirect, $50 extra needed for delivery, it will be. (Tip: Skip ahead past the genuflection.) 

Not fud, just depressing

Giving new meaning to "if it bleeds, it leads." 

Back

from the near-dead: The base camp. 

While I'm distracted

this is sudsy. It would be one thing if the wannabe militia actually did the goddamn dishes. 

Intro

sez it all.

Somewhere in there

there's a crumb.

Not fud

just good. 

April Fool's

forever. I hope. 

Prepare to meet

your accountant. Hmmm. 

Also not fud, just great

S.I. Hayakawa must be so proud, wherever the fuck he is. 

Not fud, just encouraging

It would be enough that he's articulate after eight years of chimp noises. Vision is the bonus. (Can I say it again, that Typhoid Mary was a cook and that health care for everyone might not be a ridiculous idea?) 

Sorta fud

if you think potatoes. Nicely done. 

Why is a country addicted to hot dogs

so squeamish? Now Detroit is the new Flint, 'coon the new rabbit. (Skip the video unless you like your racism with ham.) 

What's beyond

LOL?

A man

after my own liver. 

Polls

you can believe in.

The drawback to power

There's always goddamn lamb on the menu. 

Big

oops.

Sorry, not fud, just fascinating

Never had this problem in the subway, only on the bus, where the signs were more insistent that able-assed folks need to cede space. 

Not fud, just depressing

Why did we all sleep through the 2000 election and the unleashing of Go Fuck Yourself? I can't blame Panchito for everything. 

Not fud, just illuminating

This is where founding fathers pledging lives, fortunes and sacred honor has led. Go, Minnesota judges. 

Long may she run

If I were the praying sort, I'd be on my knees with a bumper-sticker printer. 

I'm so old

I remember when all FOH faces were white. And don't ask about the homophobia in the kitchen. 

Wouldn't brass

be a cheaper medium? 

Not fud, just remembering

Granada, and reading the guy's work near the guy's house. Justice, outsourced. 

And the Porcine Pantload

is getting $800 for exactly what? 

(Gleaned from Josh 8.0)

Not fud, just good

blowback.

The mailing address

of my childhood gets its 15 minutes, foam included. 

Update: The friend of nearly 40 years(!) who alerted me observes: If it wasn't rabid when it walked in, it sure was when it walked out. 

Better late than never

Could put Pfizer et al out of kids' business. 

(Filched from Opinioneater)

I assume the wine

was Wet Dreams. 

Not fud, just amazing

that NPR continues to trot them out for respectful interviews every fucking morning. 

Could you even imagine

the Chimp faced with this menu?